Haroula Alexiou sings her own songs / Χαρούλα Αλεξίου λέει δικά της

In the middle of a small apartment that i’ve rented
The laughter of a small child has embraced me
I asked everything from my life, i paid for it with my soul
as to find a place for my heart before it grows old…

It’s full moon tonight, and it’s nice
silence is different without company
I don’ t feel sorrow, but i have missed
that little girl that you loved by luck
I don’t feel sorrow, but i have missed
Your tempting lie that made everything so beautiful

It is hard for a woman to be alone
I can say it now that the truth does not make me angry…
No matter what my strength, i want a person beside me
Loneliness puts traps and hurts

It’s a full moon tonight, and it’s nice
silence is different without company…
I don’ t feel sorrow, but i have missed
That little girl you loved by luck
I don’t feel sorrow, but i have missed
Your tempting lie that made everything so beautiful

Μα έχει πανσέληνο απόψε κι είναι ωραία
το σπίτι μου έρημο μα κάνουμε παρέα.
Δεν νοιώθω θλίψη, μα μου ‘χει λείψει
το κοριτσάκι αυτό που αγάπησες τυχαία.
Δεν νοιώθω θλίψη, μα μου ‘χει λείψει
το λάγνο ψέμα σου, που τα ‘κανε όλα ωραία.

I grew old
In a monstrous city
I had my dose of fear, pollution, and lies
I’ve swallowed gross words
I’ve wriggled out from my desire in order to learn
I’ve derided my thirst in order to see why I am here
I grew old
With feelings of chemistry, in the manner of monetary transactions
With looks of sympathy
And our aimless attempts to be good
We?
We are something else, we are someone else
We always talk about other things–We always talk about other people

We always talk about other people, that way we don’t suffer, that way we forget

I grew old
Enfant terrible
With superficial politeness, with fake obedience
An actor child who plays the role of an adult
I am not talking about violence, I am talking about rape
Living the puberty means war
With puberty of mud, in an ugly town
An adult, and then a neurotic
We always talk about other things–We always talk about other people

We always talk about other people, that way we don’t suffer, that way we forget

I grew old
A subscription for a land line
And then to a Silhouette store
We cover our grief with food
Compressed dreams, then comes the depression
The freak of ego with shipwrecked self-confidence
We’re going for more
Get away–it hearts a lot
I spit on you, I kiss you–I can’t stand you but I love you
Madness–intelligence–surface–surface–surface
Land–We’ve reached land–We’ve reached land
Tears, my burning tears
The pain is softening
Tears, my good tears–biological cleaning

We always talk about other things–We always talk about other people
We always talk about other people, that way we don’t suffer, that way we forget

I grew old
Love comes above all
And below zero, my subconscious
Its earth is turning into mud
It recycles my rotten ankles
I grew old
But the child is crying
He doesn’t know what he did wrong, he has nowhere to go
He is biting his nails and wetting his sheets
Drawn off in the depths of his cradle for years
“Serves him right!–Serves him right!–Serves him right!”
His mother shouts
She gives him milk, she yells at him
That way she’ll raise him anyway

We always talk about other people, that way we don’t suffer, that way we forget

I grew old, that means to sweat like crazy
To live the absence
To acquire power
To learn to laugh
And to ambush
To make decisions
To be forbidden to lose
I grew old, that means
To live with the thing that makes you sick
To build even more roofs
To dispose tons of garbage
To blame others for injustice
To watch morning shows
To faithfully listen to analyses
To be bloodthirsty for news
To say ‘yes’ and also to say ‘no’
To be used to pornography
To lead a war on a couch
To be unable to live without cold instant coffee.

We always talk about others…

I grew old, that means
The destruction is coming
The time will bring it to you
Your mind is getting shorter
You are searching for a place to snuggle
And finding oases
In other people’s psychoses
Who for the environment have
The same face as yours
–Bended are the knees
Forgotten are the dreams. ..

Μεγάλωσα θα πει
Να` ρχεται η ανατροπή
Οι καιροί να στη φέρνουν
Τα μυαλά σου να γδέρνουν
Να ζητάς να κουρνιάσεις
Και να βρίσκεις οάσεις
Στις ψυχώσεις των άλλων
Που έχουνε για περιβάλλον
Ίδιες φάτσες με σένα
Γόνατα λυγισμένα
Όνειρα ξεχασμένα

His home is on a black cape
his only company his sorrow
was he young, was he old I don t remember anymore
but I can clearly recall only with birds he used to talk
No one ever cared to be his friend
He used to scroll alone with his dog
I was picking up some sea-shells and white pebbles
when two seagulls spoke to me
told me I should approach him because I am also alone
And I should build a love for him and he would have something to talk about.

But my own love is sea itself
I’ve treasured her like a dear friend
I’m begging the sea to sing for me again
so that my mother mermaid Magdalena
can hear my call and come ashore
I’ll ask her to give him back his voice
He’ll tell me all about his secrets, his mistakes
that made him hide away from his friends and his passions
and then the stars I’ll polish so that they’ll
shine for him to come beforw the seagulls carry me away

I’ve lived on a black cape my whole life
counting its pirates every dawn
and still there is no sight and no shine of my mother.
my song is wasted among waves
It’s hard to chose between love and sea
I’ve never cared which one causes pain
So I now drift between the two
and no one is mine and I fade away

I’ve lived on a black cape my whole life
counting its dreams every dawn.

I hear laughter and footsteps on the stairs
my friends again come home at dawn
still holding their bottles of beer
they pass my door singing happily
And I’ m still waiting for your laughter
holding a glass,turbid by my breath
I hear a knock on my door, but I don’t answer
because tonight I want to hide from everyone

Because I can’t stand them coupled
and I,without having you to hold in my arms
What am I doing here,with so much love around me?
I envy them all
and I’m longing for your caress
A body lost in the winds
What am I doing here among the lovers?

I’ m out of lies to tell them
I told them you travel for your work
and while I want be part of their joy
I let my pride prevail
Because I’ m still waiting to hear your footsteps
holding a glass turbid by my breath
I hear a knock on my door ,but I don’t answer
because tonight I want to hide from everyone

Δεν έχω άλλα παραμύθια να σκεφτώ
τους είπα τάχα πως ταξίδι έχεις πάει
κι ενώ στη ζάλη τους ποθώ να τυλιχτώ
αφήνω τον εγωισμό να με μεθάει
Γιατί το βήμα το δικό σου περιμένω
μ’ ένα ποτήρι απ’ την ανάσα μου θαμπό
ακούω την πόρτα να χτυπάει και σωπαίνω
γιατί απ’ όλους θέλω απόψε να κρυφτώ.

Once upon a time I was building a dream every day
now my road is not going any further
I am leaving, I am leaving now

Once upon a time I was looking the sun in the eye
and that sun, that broke it to pieces,
I am leaving, I am leaving now

Now the sky does not frighten me, however much it rains
now my hope has no identity
I am leaving, I am leaving now

I am leaving, I am leaving and taking with me my heart
and a song for company, with me – I am leaving

I am leaving, and I’m leaving behind me ruins,
sick people and wild beasts, I am leaving, I am leaving
I am leaving, I am leaving now

I can’t endure drowning in the lie,
now that I understand that I was just a package,
I am leaving, I am leaving now

I want to live my life out of all measure,
now that my heart has become tough as stone,
I am leaving, I am leaving now

Now the people and their shouting do not frighten me,
now my hands are tracing one message,
I am leaving, I am leaving now – I am leaving, I am leaving now.

Τώρα ο κόσμος και οι φωνές δε με τρομάζουν,
τώρα τα χέρια μου ένα σύνθημα χαράζουν,
φεύγω, τώρα φεύγω, φεύγω, τώρα φεύγω.